#56: DEN OF INIQUITY 🏙️

🚓 CRIME - Guelph man punches through screen door of family’s home after being told he could not take their furniture

🏠️ REAL ESTATE - Guelph man bites cop after being arrested for cutting down “For Sale” sign outside neighbour’s house

🍔 FAST FOOD - Man wanted for spitting on Guelph Tim Hortons staff in drive-thru window

Good morning.

A loyal subscriber replied to last week’s issue and said that Guelph has become a “den of iniquity.”

This is true.

Guelph produces - by far - the weirdest news out of any one city in Canada, and they do it consistently.

So I thought we were long overdue for a special Guelph Edition™.

I hope you enjoy.

-Peter

⌛️ Today’s read is 1.5 minutes long.

A Guelph man was arrested last Saturday for trying to break into a family’s home after being told he could not take their furniture.

Just after 6 AM on May 23, the 29-year-old man knocked on their front door and “asked if he could have some furniture which had been left outside,” according to police.

When told he could not, the man became “angry and confrontational.”

“The owners went back into the house where their children were sleeping,” said police. “But the man tried to gain entry by punching through a screen and pulling the storm door hard enough to break the handle.”

Police arrived shortly after and saw the man arguing with the homeowner on the front lawn.

When he saw the cops, he ran for it. They caught up to him after a short foot chase and arrested him.

The man is charged with attempted break and enter, breaching probation, and failing to leave a property when directed. He was held for a bail hearing.

A Guelph man faces several charges after biting a police officer last Wednesday.

Around noon on May 20, police received reports of a man cutting down a “For Sale” sign on his neighbour’s property using a chainsaw.

The 52-year-old man was already known to police. He was wanted for mischief and other charges relating to a dispute with a different neighbour.

Police arrested the man and brought him back to the station. While there, he bit a cop on the forearm.

The man is charged with assaulting police, criminal harassment, two counts of mischief under $5,000, and uttering threats. He was held for a bail hearing.

A man is wanted for spitting on a Guelph Tim Hortons employee in the drive-through window.

The man pulled up to the window near Silvercreek Parkway North and Speedvale Avenue West this past Wednesday.

He didn’t order any food, but he asked for some free empty cups.

When the employee told the man that restaurant policy forbade them from giving out free cups, he became “belligerent.”

“He began calling the employee names and then spat on them before driving away,” say police.

The man is described as black with long blond-tipped dreadlocks. He drove a grey subcompact crossover SUV at the time of the spitting.