#51: SEEKING TO DEVOUR 🧟

🏒 SPORTS - Edmonton man’s ear bitten off during fight on train after Oilers game

🚓 CRIME - Guelph woman wanted for biting corner-store owner while stealing booze

🌎️ FOREIGN AFFAIRS - Canadian woman executed atop ancient Aztec temple while visiting Mexico

Good morning.

It is the natural order of things that—as the social fabric of our society unravels—people will seek to devour one another.

The reason for this is twofold:

1. An unarmed citizenry must use its teeth as a weapon.

2. An impoverished citizenry, hungry, will eat meat from unconventional but plentiful sources—i,e., cats, dogs, squirrels, fellow humans, etc.

You can already see this playing out in the news: random acts of violence are turning into random acts of cannibalism. 

Woman steals booze from corner store, tries to eat owner on way out 

Suspect eats Edmonton man’s ear during fight on train

With that being said, enjoy our totally unplanned Cannibal Edition™. 

-Peter

⌛️ Today’s read is 60 seconds long. (Quick one!)

An Edmonton man had his ear bitten off Monday night while riding the train home from an Oilers game.

Few details have emerged of the grisly encounter on the Edmonton LRT, but photos and videos of the fight and its aftermath have circulated on social media.

Yegwave, Edmonton’s version of 6ixbuzz, posted a photo of two men fighting on the train followed by a short video of a severed ear laying on the ground.

Police have not filed a report addressing the alleged incident.

The men were returning from a 4-3 Oilers victory. They are tied 1-1 with the Anaheim Ducks in their first-round playoff series.

A woman is wanted for biting the owner of a Guelph convenience store Wednesday evening while stealing his booze.

The woman and her friend tried to buy alcohol from the store around 6 PM on April 22, but the owner refused to serve them because they had no ID.

One of the women returned a short time later, grabbed a case of alcohol, and tried to flee, but the owner intercepted her.

A struggle ensued during which the woman bit the owner’s wrist and hand, leaving a small cut.

She escaped with “one can of alcohol.”

The owner of the store declined medical attention when police arrived.

The wanted woman is described as 5’6” with blonde hair. She wore a black dress with a printed pattern at the time of the assault.

A 32-year-old Canadian woman has been killed after a masked gunman opened fire Monday upon tourists visiting an ancient temple in Mexico.

The gunman also wounded a six year-old Colombian child, two other Colombians aged 37 and 22, a 55-year-old Dutchman, and a 42-year-old Russian.

The 27-year-old shooter killed himself directly after the random attack at the Teotihuacan pyramids north of Mexico City.

The shooter’s motive is still unclear, but investigators say he planned the attack, played strange music, ranted about hating tourists, and fired randomly.

Mexican authorities have sent the woman’s body to her family in Canada.

It’s a sad day … it’s a terrible circumstance,” Prime Minister Mark Carney said earlier this week.

“We’re working with Mexican authorities,” he added.

The Pyramid of the Moon was built by the ancient Teotihuacan civilization around 100 AD. They used it as a stage for human and animal sacrifices, as did the Aztecs centuries later.