#40: CALL IT 🪙

🚗 DRIVING - Alleged drunk driver tries to bribe OPP officer

👩‍❤️‍👨 DATING - Sophie Trudeau says being 'uncoupled at 50' doesn't 'feel amazing' as Justin globetrots with Katy Perry

🏒 HOCKEY - #1 NHL draft prospect arrested on felony assault charge

Good morning. What’s the most you ever won on a coin toss?

A few weeks ago I won a free round of drinks on a coin toss.

My wife and I were eating dinner at the Ryan-Reynolds-owned Canadian Brewhouse when the maître d' stopped by our table and complimented me on my ketchup-stained Team Canada jersey. He showed me a Loonie and said, “Call it - heads or tails.” If I won he’d buy us a round of drinks. If he won—well I’m actually not sure what would’ve happened if he won because I didn’t ask. That was an oversight.

Anyway, I bet “heads” and got it right. Boy, was I glad. He bought me a tankard of Mill Street Organic and a strawberry margarita for my wife.

What’s the most you ever lost on a coin toss?

The year is 2026 and betting against Christ’s return on Polymarket pays a middling 5.5% annual return, says Bloomberg.

The odds of Christ's Second Coming occurring before 2027 currently sit at 4.2%.

For those of you unfamiliar with prediction markets, this means a 'YES' share is priced at 4 cents. If you buy in now and Christ returns by Dec. 31, your 4-cent investment pays out a full dollar—essentially winning you the 96 cents put up by the skeptics who bought 'NO' shares. 

(The veracity of Christ’s Second Coming will be decided by a “consensus of credible sources,” says Polymarket.)

Betting on God isn’t really a new phenomenon. In the 17th century Blaise Pascal (a French math nerd) posited that faith is a gambling man’s virtue. 

“God is, or He is not," he said. “A game is being played… where heads or tails will turn up. What will you wager?”

Only fools gamble with eternity, said Pascal. Moreover, “you must wager. It is not optional."

“What’s the most you ever lost on a coin toss?” asks the psychopath Chigurh in No Country for Old Men (2007).

Chigurh: “You need to call it. I can’t call it for you. It wouldn’t be fair.”

Storekeeper: “I didn’t put nothing up.”

Chigurh: “Yes, you did. You’ve been putting it up your whole life—you just didn’t know it.”

Storekeeper: “Look, I need to know what I stand to win.”

Chigurh: “Everything… you stand to win everything. Call it.”

Enjoy today’s stories, friend-o.

-Peter

⌛️ Today’s read is 2 minutes long.

🎲 WHAT ARE THE ODDS?

▲ 44% chance a province schedules a referendum to leave Canada before 2027 (+12% this year).

▲ 21% chance Justin Trudeau & Katy Perry get engaged before 2027 (+2% this year).

▼ 21% chance Pierre Poilievre OUT as leader of Conservatives before 2027 (-2% this year).

▲ 34% chance a federal election will be called before June (+28% this year).

▼ 69% chance the separatist Parti Québécois wins Quebec’s general election in October (-8% this year).

▲ 4% chance Christ returns before 2027 (+2% this year).

*Odds are based on yes/no betting activity by users on Polymarket.

A man is in trouble after allegedly trying to bribe an OPP officer who accused him of drunk driving.

65-year-old Frederick Blow of Puslinch, ON, drove his car into a ditch near Milton on Tuesday evening. Police heard a report of a single-vehicle collision and went to investigate. 

“Officers suspected the driver to be impaired,” the OPP said in a statement released Wednesday. 

“The driver refused to comply with a demand for a breath sample into an approved alcohol screening device and subsequently attempted to bribe an officer.”

Police did not elaborate on the alleged bribe.

Blow is charged under the Criminal Code with bribery of officers and failure or refusal to comply with a demand.

His car was impounded for seven days and his license has been suspended for three months.

Blow is due in court in Guelph on April 21.

_{Source: Toronto Sun}

Justin Trudeau’s ex-wife isn’t too hot on the single life.

“Fine. I’ll admit it. On the surface, being ‘uncoupled’ at 50 on Valentine’s Day doesn’t make me feel amazing,” wrote Sophie Grégoire Trudeau in a newsletter distributed last week, according to the National Post.

After 18 years of marriage, Grégoire Trudeau separated from former Prime Minister Justin Trudeau in August 2023. They had three children together: Hadrien, 11, Ella-Grace, 16, and Xavier, 18, an aspiring pop singer.

The Trudeaus have not announced a legal divorce.

“Midlife singlehood isn’t a failure. Often, it’s a recalibration — a moment where the noise quiets enough for us to hear our own voice again,” Grégoire Trudeau wrote.

She added that Valentine’s Day “can feel especially loud” when you’re single, and she encouraged “uncoupled” individuals to practice self-love.

“Self-love is a practice,” she said. “At its core, it’s safety. And safety comes from presence.”

This will be Grégoire Trudeau’s third Valentine’s Day since separating from Justin, who is not single.

The former prime minister has been dating U.S. pop star Katy Perry since last summer. They went “Instagram official” in December. Perry also accompanied Trudeau to Davos, Switzerland, last month for the World Economic Forum.

Grégoire Trudeau has previously told the media that she tries not to let Justin’s love life affect her.

“If I decide to let that define me, I lose myself,” she told Yahoo Canada. “This is true for me or for every human being on the planet. If you let the outside world define you, you won’t have the sacredness of knowing who you are.”

Gavin McKenna, the Yukon-bred hockey star widely projected to be the first overall pick in the 2026 NHL Draft, has been charged with felony aggravated assault following an incident in Pennsylvania last month.

McKenna, an 18-year-old forward for the Penn State Nittany Lions, was arraigned Wednesday for allegedly punching a 21-year-old man in the face on Jan. 31—the same day Penn State lost 5-4 to Michigan State.

Several unverified reports claim the man was insulting McKenna’s mother when the young star beat him up.

The man reportedly suffered injuries significant enough to require corrective surgery.

McKenna faces one count of felony aggravated assault, a misdemeanor count of simple assault, and two summary counts of harassment and disorderly conduct.

The Whitehorse native was released after posting $20,000 bail and is not currently in custody.

In a brief statement, Penn State Athletics acknowledged the charges but declined to provide further details, citing the ongoing legal proceedings. If convicted on the felony charge, McKenna could face several years in prison and significant fines.

A preliminary hearing is scheduled for Feb. 11 in Centre County.